Oh, yeah. I'm not dead.
I come bearing yet another KttK fic. Fake lj-cut to my LJ. O NOES!Title: A Role ModelFandom:
Keys to the KingdomTheme:
Arthur Penhaligon/Ray GreenRating:
Or should it be Ray Green/Arthur Penhaligon? Word of Arthur’s exploits reaches the recruits in the Glorious Army of the Architect.
Title: A Little Too Salty
Fandom: Kingdom Hearts 2
Theme: #10, "sweet sweet money"
Pairing: Scrooge McDuck/Leon/Cloud
Summary: Scrooge thinks he's got his ice-cream recipe just about perfect! He tries out his 'special batch' on two handy Hollow Bastion residents.( “Sea salt!” said Scrooge McDuck. “Mostly.”Collapse )There's no ocean in Hollow Bastion. How did you think he got sea salt flavor?
In celebration of OFFICIAL WINGSHIP DAY (dude, Crisis Core trailer
) I bring you a big ol' bucket of dirty dirty wingsex! If you haven't actually watched the trailer, read no further! There will be hot and juicy spoilers! Or rather, just the one hot and juicy spoiler. About, you know, the fact that Angeal has a wing.
Fandom: FFVII (Crisis Core-Era)
Pairing: Sephiroth's Wing x Angeal's Wing
(plus bonus Wingy Tseng, Reeve, Cait, Zack, and Cloud. It's sex because wings are sex, you see?)
: ( UntitledCollapse )
: ( Zack Has a SandwichCollapse )
: ( Screw It, Everybody Gets OneCollapse )
: ( Wait wait wait I got another!!Collapse )
Title: "Warm and Fluffy"
Fandom: FFVII (AC)
Pairing: Cait Sith x Loz (mpreg)
Okay. Me? Going to hell. Going STRAIGHT to hell. I said I'd never do mpreg but starherd
happened to mention it when my brain was feeling tender and this picture dropped out a few hours later. It's worksafe--i.e. no naughty bits showing--but it's still the implausibly budding man-fruit of interspecies union, so your call there.( CHECK IT OUTCollapse )omg
Title: "E-Mag Hearts Masamune Liek Woah"
Just because the Turk e-mag rods don't have names doesn't mean they can't have spirits too! This one's a bit star-struck by Masamune, but Masa has so
been there and done that and anyway the kid's too SHORT.( OMG LUVZCollapse )the original version didn't have the boxers, but not even reno's baton would be so tarty.
I realised the last one was kinda crappy. So I did this one in hopes of winning you back.Title
: "The Bed and Breakfast of CEOs"Fandom
: #10, "sweet, sweet money"Pairing
: Palmer x HeideggerRating
: R for only one reason: Palmer Penis™!Summary
: And by "bed and breakfast", I mean something which is given to you that's worth more than what you paid for. And by that, I mean that most bed and breakfast's are pretty humble, asking for a relatively low price, and then giving you really good service. AND I WOULD KNOW.( Hey—hey—hey—hey! I used to be one!Collapse )
- Music:the air conditioner. how melodious
Hi, I'm still pretty new. Yay, for me. Thanks for liking my crap stuff. It makes a retard feel pretty happy. And if any of you are retarded or know retards, I'm sorry for my indiscretion. But not really.
To-day's is a gift for me, myself, and I, and I hope you like it as much as I like it. Which isn't very much, but it was still fun to write. That's the point of 30_whowhatnow
, right? Or is the point more along the lines of "to indulge in crackfic"? This place is so cool. Can this place get any better? I SUBMIT THAT IT CANNOT. (whisper whisper, it can, don't let me tell you lies like that).Title
: "Boy Toy Gone Wrong"Fandom
: Reeve x Cait Sith DollRating
: R to G( He sat down to work.Collapse )
- Music:Come Back - Foo Fighters
Hellolololo~! It is Bedlam14, the infamous gender-neutral~! ...Unless you've never heard of it, in which case, erm. I'm innocent. Sweet and naive.
HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE HEARD OF THE KEYS TO THE KINGDOM SERIES BY GARTH NIX?!
IT WAS FOR HER LOVE.Fandom:
Keys to the KingdomTheme:
#25, Completely unimpressedPairing:
Suzy Turquoise Blue is tired to being ignored by her one true love. She decides to take matters into her own hands and makes a bold move! But will her heart’s desire respond?! ...No, actually that's all a lie.
I don't own KttK.... and if Garth Nix ever read this.... I'm not sure what he'd do. Probably defenestrate me, for one thing. Who knows? THIS IS A LINK TO MY LJ. That was a public service announcement.
Uuuweeee, this is a cool place. I will have much fun here. I would like to introduce a series of ficcies that I am titling "箆棒二人組", or "Absurd Couple". I'll start soft (for my own sake). And then proceed on with real
crackfic. And if you like these, I have a whole other series of ficcies that's just ready to be written right after 箆棒二人組. So! On with it, then?Title
: "Race of the Stoics"Fandom
: #13, "Bet you can't get there in time"Pairing
: Vincent x Red XIIIRating
: R? NC-17? Not sure. One of those two...( It was, to say, remarkable.Collapse )
- Music:Faint - Linkin Park
Hi. I'm new.
It must be said. Damn
, you're crazy.
And all I have to say to that is this:Title
: "Impromptu to Guns and Carnivorous Plants
, but More Like New Saguaro, the Desert Cactus"Fandom
: Reno x Potted PlantRating
: NC-17, and also, NP-17, as in, No Plants Allowed under the age of 17 days
Summary: Reno returns to Elena's office to get to the root
of things, only to discover she's repotted
and moved on with her life, and cultured
out the old office. Seriously bad plant jokes in bold.( Reno nodded, and knew what to do.Collapse )
- Music:El Mañana - The Gorillaz
Title: "Souba Doesn't Heart Cerberus"
Fandom: FFVII (AC)
Pairing: Cerberus x Souba
The spirit of Cerberus is a cheerful sort most of the time--something about having three barrels, as they say, disposes one positively toward the world. Cerberus likes people! Cerberus especially likes the spirit of Souba, because they're fancy
, but still gets a little horked off when Souba calls him 'plebeian'. Souba insists they only put up with Cerberus because he's a demon in bed.( Look, Souba! I'm doing my Aeris impression!Collapse )
(I was going to do more shading on these guys, but my eyes melted and ran out of my face. Sorry!)
Title: "Velvet Nightmare Hearts Dual Hound"
Fandom: FFVII (AC)
Pairing: The anthropomorphic interpretation of Dual Hound x the anthropomorphic interpretation of Velvet Nightmare, g'duh.
Returning to the theme of the souls
of weapons, this bit celebrates the adorable love shared by Velvet Nightmare and Dual Hound. It is completely worksafe and G-rated. You can think about it in a filthy sexual way if you WANT, but for me this is pure sugar fluff and happiness.
...and that's partially because Dual Hound looks kinda like a Boston terrier got it on with Pikachu. Twice.( Squee!Collapse )sometimes velvet nightmare throws tennis balls for them. seriously.